“Succession” and Ambivalent Loss

Spoiler alert: If you’re not current in your viewing of the popular HBO series “Succession,” skip this post because there are spoilers.

“The king is dead, long live the king!” is a phrase we’ve heard throughout history to announce the death of one monarch and the upcoming coronation of the next. It would be an appropriate phrase in corporate terms for the death of Logan Roy of “Succession.” Except that the manipulations and machinations behind the scenes to determine Logan’s successor continue even after his death. His corporate leaders and his three youngest children vie for power. (The eldest son is still toying with a run for president of the U.S., a role to which he brings absolutely nothing relevant.) 

Conflicting feelings lead to ambivalent loss

How will things shake out in these power plays? Stay tuned! But what is immediately evident is the ambivalent loss each of Logan Roy’s adult children struggles with. They have all had tempestuous relationships with their father, the only kind of relationship Logan Roy is capable of. And the ambivalent relationships in this fictional world result in the internal conflicts his children face as they live their lives and try to grieve the death of the man they each failed to please, who also failed to love them. 

Connor, the oldest of Connor’s children, is preparing to marry a woman who has made it clear that the Roy money is the most compelling of Connor’s charms. They are in the midst of their wedding when the other adult children learn that Logan collapsed in the restroom of his private plane and is getting CPR from a member of the crew. 

There is intrigue, in the form of a piece of paper that is open to interpretation: it either underlines Kendall’s name as corporate successor or draws a line through it, eliminating Kendall from consideration as successor. And Logan, as the only one who can solve the mystery, is dead or dying and unable to clarify his wishes. 

Seduction and betrayal set the stage for ambivalence

Logan seduced and betrayed everyone in his life, from his corporate shills to his children. They are reeling more from his death than they would have, had he just been a kind man or a total terror. The toxic combination of seduction and betrayal makes his death much more difficult to mourn, because it means that the clock has stopped on any possible rapprochement with Logan.

His survivors have their confusing emotions. His children want to feel love toward their father, but he made it impossible. He was skipping his oldest son’s wedding to meet someone else in an attempt to double cross his other children in a business deal. And they were in the process of trying to double cross him and each other. That’s what directly preceded the chest compressions. 

Now they are left mourning a man they wanted to love, but couldn’t. And they hate him, but feel guilty. 

Ambivalent loss? You bet! This kind of loss is difficult to deal with, whether the person who died is a manipulative parent, a spouse who had an affair, an unscrupulous business partner, or someone who was confusing in other ways. 

If you are dealing with ambivalent loss, talking with a therapist can help you deal with all sides of the ambivalence, so that you can make peace with the contradictory feelings and incorporate them into your idea of the person who died. You can move past your guilt at being angry at the person or relieved—or both! Your situation doesn’t have to be as drama-soaked as “Succession” for you to benefit from therapy. Contact me and let’s get started on helping you deal with the confusing feelings.

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